Week 7: Storytelling--The Dragon of the Golden Scales, or Interruptions and the Pot of Gold

Once upon a time, at the top of a happy little hill, there sat a pot of gold.  On a misty day, by lucky happenstance, there was a rainbow that seemed to end at the top of this hill, and a pair of friends decided to follow said rainbow to see if--just maybe--the truth about leprechauns hiding pots of gold at the ends of rainbows could be true.  And wouldn't you know it, our pair soon became as happy as the hill on which they stood when they discovered the little pot of shimmering metal.

Now our friends were an odd pair--a mismatched pair, even.  On the one hand there was a small but brave mouse by the name of Lancelot, who dearly loved cheese and thought of many clever schemes by which to gain wealth in order to trade for his beloved swiss.  The other companion was a knight, covered head to toe in dented armor, who refused to take off his helmet for fear people would release that he was supposed to be questing in dangerous, distant lands.  His name was Hawt Dawg Diggory.

The two did not wish to share the gold, each saying that he had been the one to instigate the trip up the hill and so should be the one to claim the money.  But Hawt Dawg Diggory knew that Lancelot's one weakness (other than cheese) was competition, and so he challenged his mousy friend to a race.  To which, of course, our brave little rodent readily agreed.

There is one more thing, though, that you should know about Hawt Dawg:  he owned the Starship Enterprise.  Knowing that in his clunky and junky armor he would not be able to beat the swift mouse up the hill, he resolved instead to beam himself up to the top immediately.  Unfortunately for him, our little mouse was even cleverer.

You see, Lancelot was a very common-looking mouse and knew some other common-looking mice who lived near the top of the hill.  He positioned one at the middle of the hill and one up at the top inside the pot of gold, hoping to fool Hawt Dawg Diggory into thinking that Lancelot himself had made it up to the top.  And so the race began. . .

Now Hawt Dawg had never beamed himself anywhere before, and for a moment kept yelling "Beam me up, Scotty!" in the hopes that a Scotty would appear and beam Hawt Dawg up obligatorily.  After a minute Hawt Dawg Diggory figured out how to do the beaming personally, but before he transported he noticed that Lancelot (or at least his doppelganger) was already halfway up the hill.  Of course, he still thought he had plenty of time since teleportation only takes a couple seconds, so off he went into momentary oblivion.

When Hawt Dawg Diggory re-apparated at the top of the happy little hill, he picked up the pot of gold believing that he had won.  That was, until he heard a little squeaky voice calling from inside the pot.  Looking in among the gold, Hawt Dawg saw a little mouse much like Lancelot (the trippelganger) swimming among the pieces.  Knowing (though incorrectly) that he had lost, Hawt Dawg put the pot back down in the grass and stomped off down the hill, clanking all the way.

But when Lancelot (the real one, this time) reached the top of the hill and thanked his mousy friends, he realized that he could not transport the pot anywhere in order to buy his mountains of cheese.  Luckily, Interruptions (a very lonely dragon) took this moment to fly overhead, and was himself distracted by the flashing of gold below.  Thus, Interruptions landed on the hill and there he encountered our flustered little Lancelot.

Lancelot chose this moment to draw his lightsaber, thinking that perhaps the mighty Interruptions had come to steal his gold.  But, instead, this new duo struck a deal:  Interruptions would fly Lancelot and his gold to the cheese market on the moon in return for half of the pot.  And so Lancelot climbed aboard Interruptions' head, grabbing onto a horn for support, and Interruptions grasped in his claws the pot of gold, and they flew up into the sky towards the moon, Interruptions's scales flashing emerald in the sunlight.

Now, when our companions reached the moon there was the slight problem of how Interruptions would carry his share of the gold back to the earth.  (Though, while Interruptions was pondering, Lancelot was too distracted by the cheese that was the moon to be concerned about this conundrum.)  Eventually, Interruptions decided that he would simply melt the gold with his fiery breath and then gild his stomach with the molten gold, giving him both dashing good looks and extra protection from the pesky horned penguins that kept trying to shoot him down when he flew ahead.

And there it is:  that is the story of how Interruptions the dragon obtained his gleaming golden scales--and the story of how Lancelot the brave little mouse bought the cheese wheel that is the moon!

The End.

(P.S.  The little hill is no longer happy, for he misses his friendship with the pot of gold.  In fact, he holds a grudge against Interruptions and Lancelot.  The hill hopes to get revenge with the aid of his friend, Ke$ha, the Moschino cash cow who often grazes on his delightful grasses.  But that is a story for another day. . .)


Author's Note.  For those of you who did not read my story last week, this is kind of a continuation in that it uses some of the same cast of characters and follows the same style--a kind of random, childish, fantastical method of story-telling.  The story itself I did not change much, except for changing the characters from a rabbit and a frog to a knight and a mouse (and adding in the bits about the Enterprise and the cheese moon, of course, haha).  Additionally, this story was originally about how a duck got his golden breast and not how a dragon got his golden scales, but really those are the same thing, so no big difference there, lol.  Hope you enjoyed my randomness!  Arrivederci!

Bibliography.  How the Sacred Duck Got His Yellow Breast, from Tibetan Folk Tales by A.L. Shelton with illustrations by Mildred Bryant (1925).  UnTextbook.

Image Information.  Dig here for pot of gold, photo by Richard Dorrell, 2008.  Geograph.